It is crazy how much emotions can change from one day to the next or really, in my craziness, one moment to the next.
Yesterday was a great day. I felt like a decent mom who had activities planned for her energy crazed daughter. We went to the park for awhile, ran some errands, had lunch, played with her babies, went for a walk, and finally daddy came home since he had training that day! (Yay for working 6:30-2:30!) We hung out as a family. Went to the mall, ate dinner and walked around. It was just nice. I loved it.
Then today my emotions change. Matt is back to this normal schedule. Mady has been really fussy and constantly chewing on her fingers (her eye teeth are FINALLY coming in!) so I know she doesn't feel good. I make lunch for her to only push it away and not want to eat it. She goes down for an early nap so I know she will be up early and I have to find ways to entertain her. It has just been hard.
On days like today I miss my family (mom, dad, brothers, mother-in-law) so much. Like it hurts so much. I wish we could just hop in the car and head to my parents to swim in the pool for a little bit and do some shopping with Nana. It is always a nice and pleasant distraction and plus we love hangin out with Nana.
I know we are here, in Virginia, for a reason but I am ready to move back to NJ like yesterday. I am ready for Mady to be around her family and grandparents who love her beyond measure. I don't want to be here for, at least, 6 more months but it is not my timing or my plan...at all. I need to Trust.
This is just what is going on in my mind at the moment. I was ready to pack Mady and I's bags and head to NJ this afternoon but then I would be leaving Matt behind on his days off and we already miss him so much during the week that it is not an option.
Oh well...the life must go on.